To-Do List for Finding Hope

I woke up this morning with a heavy heart. Anxious. I don't typically live in fear. For whatever reason my siblings all seemed to get the "scaredy-cat" gene. However, I am more or less fearless. But, a few months ago my parents and littlest sister moved to Florida. Not far from Orlando. And with all that has happened there in the last few days, it is unnerving. In addition, my Florida family has been making frequent overseas trips. My dad just left for another one today. And I will admit it, I am a bit uneasy. So, I woke up praying this morning-praying for my family, my dad, our country. As I prayed, I was reminded of what God told Solomon immediately following the dedication of the temple. It had been a joyous time for the people of God. I Chronicles 7:10 says, "....he (Solomon) sent the people away to their homes, joyful and glad of heart for the prosperity that the Lord had granted to David and to Solomon and to Israel his people." However, that very night God appeared to Solomon and told him that WHEN (not IF) he shut up the heavens and there was no rain, or commanded the locust to devour the land, then, "If my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land." (II Chronicles 7:14) And realization washed over me and I felt that peace that passes all understanding. Because, ya'll, healing for our country doesn't depend on our government. It doesn't depend on their decisions regarding marriage or bathrooms. Healing for our country doesn't depend on our President. It doesn't depend on the phraseology he uses or doesn't use when he refers to the most recent horrific attacks; it doesn't even depend on our right to bear arms. Healing for our land depends on God and HIS PEOPLE. That's me. And, if you are a Christian, that's YOU! It depends on God's people. My dad always says faithful Christians have a hard enough time acting Christ-like. How can we then expect the unregenerate to act as redeemed? We can't. God doesn't. He expects HIS PEOPLE, to do several things: 

1-Humble ourselves. Realize we are but dust and in desperate need of His all-sufficient grace. 

2-Pray. When we pray we are acknowledging that we are not in control. We are surrendering to His Sovereignty. We are continuing to humble ourselves. And according to James 5:16, "The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working."  

3-Seek His face. Seek: to go in search of or quest of. In I John the Bible tells us that the Word became flesh and dwelt among us. To seek God, to seek His face, is to search the Word, Scripture. 

4-Turn from your wicked ways. In Psalm 139:23-24 the Psalmist asks God to, "Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts; And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!" God is faithful. He will reveal our wickedness, our grievous ways. But then, by His death-defeating power, we must TURN from our wicked ways. We must turn to the faithful, righteous, narrow way. 

THEN He will hear from heaven, forgive our sins, and heal our land! My type A (triple A?), list-making, list-checking personality loves this. Follow these steps and there is a predictable, sure outcome! What hope!  

Hope is my favorite word. I have it tattooed on my wrist with an anchor. Because hope is an anchor for our souls. 

According to I Peter, hope is living! It is alive. Because our ultimate hope, healed land or not, is found in our imperishable, undefiled, and unfading inheritance, kept in heaven for us. Our inheritance is guarded by God the Father, through faith, for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. (I Peter 1) Our ultimate hope that will anchor our souls, that will ease our anxiety, that will calm our uneasiness is that our fire-tested faith will produce for us an eternal (FOREVER) glory.  "Our light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal." (II Corinthians 4:17-18). 

I. AM. SELFISH.

I'm just putting it out there.  Admission is the first step, right? And I admit, I am selfish.  This has become quite evident to me in the last few months.  Although, looking back on my life, I am sure it was evident to everyone else long before now.  

My church ladies are currently studying the book of Ruth together.  Ruth is my middle name.  I used to loathe it as an old lady name.  But, as I read and reread the story of Ruth, I am thankful to be named after such a faithful, Godly, courageous woman.  In an attempt to know all I can about my namesake I picked up Sinclair Ferguson's book A Faithful God.  In the beginning chapters of his commentary on Ruth, Mr. Ferguson proposes that Naomi's bitter circumstances were allowed by a loving God for the conversion of Ruth.  I don't like my life circumstances sometimes.  I have sailed some troubled waters the last few years.  But, if it were all for the conversion of one, would I count those situations as "worth it?"  Would I be willing to endure them again for the redemption of one soul?  Heaven help me, I don't know that I can honestly say that I would.  So, when it comes right down to it, this confession means that comfort, temporary satisfaction, and self are my gods.  I have idols.  I am an idolater.  

In Romans 9:3 Paul says, "For I wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers..."  Naomi endured hard times, extremely hard times, willingly or not, that led to the conversion of Ruth.  Paul is willing, WISHING, that he could give up his salvation, his relationship with His Lord and Savior, for the sake of his kinsman.  While there is a chance I would relive the hard times of the last few years for the salvation of someone I love, I am hard pressed to think of one person that I love so dearly that I would wish to surrender my own salvation for theirs. This is nothing to be proud of, but it would be a lie for me to claim otherwise.   Go ahead and judge me; I have already judged myself.  I am selfish.  I warned you of that at the beginning of all of this.  

My parents relocated recently to the sunshine state.  As such, we had a white Christmas.  And by white Christmas I mean white sandy beaches and white hot heat.  Their new church is involved in a ministry of feeding the homeless on a monthly basis.  It just so happened that the Monday before Christmas was their day to go downtown, and I was in town.  In theory I like the idea of serving others.  But, again, my selfishness reminds me that in truth, I like serving for the warm and fuzzy feeling I get more than anything.  Sigh.  After the meal there was a service.  I have never seen people with so little praise God with so much.  They were thanking Him for Christmas: not the gifts they would be getting for Christmas.  Because there weren't any.  Not the big meal they would be enjoying on Christmas day.  Because there wasn't one.  Not the family or friends they would be spending time with.  Because they had none.  They were praising Him for Christmas, simply that-the sending of His Son for their salvation.  

I had dinner with a dear friend a couple of weeks ago.  We were discussing a very serious, very hard, life-altering, situation currently concerning her family.  A situation that puts my last two years into perspective pretty.darn.quick.  With every good intention many Christians have reassured my friend, K, that "God works all things together for our good."  So many people forget the second half of that verse..."for the good of them that love Him AND ARE CALLED ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSE."  And ladies and gentlemen, as Christians our primary purpose is to glorify Him.  While in our human understanding we may think we know what is most glorifying to God.  We don't.  We aren't God and His ways are not our ways-they are infinitely higher than our ways.  Thank heavens.  Because my ways are selfish and sinful.  It occurred to me in the midst of said conversation, God is receiving more glory through my singleness at the moment (and perhaps forever), than through answering "yes" to my relentless prayers for a mate.  Me being able to live single with joy and contentment is only by His strength in my weakness.  My selfishness, most times, desires a yes answer to my prayer more than His glory.  Emphatic sigh.

In 2016 I want to be less concerned with my own comfort, and more concerned about the lost.  Less concerned about my sleep and more concerned about waking up to spend time with the Lord.  Less concerned about new clothes/shoes/purses/make-up (fill in the blank) and more concerned with giving.  Less concerned with my desires and more concerned with His glory.  Less selfish and more selfless.  And if admission to a problem is truly the first step, then by God's grace, I am headed in the right direction.